Letters: June 11, 2006

This week, we hear from many people who actually appear to understand the website! It's a high point in human history.

Let's all laugh at models.

I know you like to make fun of models so here is a picture of an outfit from the winter 2007 dolce and gabbana collection: http://i5.tinypic.com/11si0yr.jpg - Kira Jenkins

Josh: Hahah! That's so stupid. Thanks Kira!

LOVE!

Hi,

I have to say to the Enduring Vision that I love you. I know I don't tell you enough, but I love you.

Second: I very much enjoyed the story explaining why banning gay marriage is such a top priority in our nation. (https://www.enduringvision.com/news/health_010306.php) It just makes so much sense. Although I really think you should have also explored the connection between Hurricane Katrina and homosexuality, which was obviously the cause of that natural disaster. Other than that your story was superb.

Oh and I love you. - Rebecca

Josh: Wow, this letter edition is really shaping up -- intelligent letters so far, and Rebecca even gave us love! And she remembered to link the article she was talking about! I'm beginning to think I was brutally murdered by a crazed visitor who didn't understand satire, and am now in heaven!

It's not really me...OR IS IT?

wtf? - me

Josh: What?! Does something happen to me in the future?

OMG RLY

Did you know that Hot Topic is a Gap store? Not trying to be smarter than you oh dark lord, just asking. - crackhead

Josh: I'm glad you asked about that thing
'Cause what I'd like to do is sing!
A song about gettin' people to do stuff for you
By usin' compliments even if they ain't true!
'Cause you look like you lost some weight
Now lick my hands and paint that crate!

Okay!

I gotcha!

Ohhhhh...

See! Noooow yoooou try!

All right!
You look great
In that shirt
Now help me hem
My brand new skirt!
(okay!)
You have very nice
Cheekbones
Now help me co-sign
This bank loan!

'Cause a compliment will get you far
Even if it's just a lie
'Cause your skin is soft as buttermilk
Now help me shave my thighs!
Yes you gotta compliment
because it's not complicated
If you want some lemonade
You gotta start manipulatin'!
We wish it was different
But that's the way it has to be
'Cause you need to compliment
'Cause that's what people needs!

Yeah!

Gotcha.

More love!

Hi Josh. You've been on a hiatus I see. So have I. Not with my site(s), but I mean I haven't read EV for about half a year now.

Don't worry though, I'm officially coming out of the hiatus this coming monday. At which point my staff of workers (meaning myself) will be reading the EV at least once a night, regardless of whether or not there's anything new to read.

I love you Josh! - Vince

Josh: If we're allowed the occasional hiatus, so are our readers. Welcome back to the light, Vince! Now you must read EVERY STORY you missed while you were gone. I expect a detailed report next week.

In Other News

U.S.
Conservationists Fear Dwindling Park Space Reduces Places Kids Can Safely Get High (07/13/10)

U.S.
Area Man's Use Of Pay Phone Angers, Confuses Coworkers (07/11/10)

Sports
LeBron James Announces Plan To Follow In Jordan's Footsteps, Play For Birmingham Barons Minor League Squad (07/08/10)

Politics
Anti-Incumbent Sentiment In Washington Kills Senator Robert Byrd (06/28/10)

Video
The Enduring Vision: A Documentary In Two Parts (06/21/10)

Letters
Your Letters Answered (06/17/10)

World
U.S. Identifies Vast Deposits Of Unobtainium In Afghanistan (06/16/10)

U.S.
BP Points Out That Oil Spill Could Give Rise To Toxic Avenger Style Superhero (06/14/10)

Health
Area Man Definitely Counting That Walk To The Mailbox As Today's Exercise (06/10/10)

Even More Shit:

twitter

HumorFeed

The Beast

RSS Feed

Paying The Bills:

--------------------